Could you first introduce yourself to the reader?
Sure thing. I am Sasha, a physical performer and acrobat from Dublin. My work is composed of mixing different techniques used in mime, dance and aerial acrobatics to create physical theatre stories/shows. I have been actively on stage for more than 10 years, mostly as performer but also as choreographer and now bringing my first full-length solo show to Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
How would you describe your show?
I personally would describe it as a peek through the window of somebody living with mental health issues, told solely through physical movement such as (aerial) acrobatics, dance and mime. It is a personal re-telling of situations and experiences of my fiancée Cíana Fitzgerald and her long standing struggle with PTSD, clinical depression and anxiety, and a few moments that reflect my struggle with body dysmorphia due to a history of anorexia. I wanted to shed an honest light on how heavily it can affect people and consequently their navigation through (sometimes) the simplest situations. Now, this all sounds so dark and bleak, but there are quite funny moments in the show, inspired by real-life comedic frustration, that I thought would add some lightness to the show. Fingers crossed, otherwise it’d be almost an hour of Depress-a-me Street.
What is your favourite part of your show?
(SPOILER ALERT!):
The whole jacket situation for me is my favourite part. It adds a more light-hearted moment to the whole story, allows me to be ridiculous for a moment (…. which is new to my work, because my work is always soooooo serious you wouldn’t believe it. You’d think I live off tears and despair.)
That specific scene was inspired by one of those hilariously frustrating moments that happened during a time when Cíana felt her worst. Her being able to laugh about the comedy of a very dark time is something that deeply inspired me and, in my opinion, had to be included. Other than that, the whole aerial sequence part, and moment surrounding it. I love living through these obscure moments on stage, especially in this one, as it has a surreal feel to it and allows me to switch off that real-life character for a moment all the while I throw my body around in the air.
If your show had a theme song, what would it be and why?
I was first thinking the Eurovision ’96 entry ‘My Lovely Horse’ by Father Ted & Father Dougal McGuire, but after a long debate had to decide for Massive Attack – Paradise Circus. I found it quite suitable to the show as a whole. It carries melancholy and sadness, quite repetitively until the change at the end when the strings set in, opening up to the feeling of hope. To something that provides light and comfort at the end of it all.
Which is pretty much exactly how I feel the show feels.
Are there any particular themes or messages you hope the audience takes away from your performance?
Not necessarily messages or themes, more a feeling of understanding and feeling understood. The show was written to inspire an honest conversation surrounding mental health (in all its varieties), and also not to glorify it to a level where it diminishes the severity of it all. There are themes within the show that some people might recognise in themselves, and maybe never found the courage to speak about it. I am hoping that this show might spark that courage. And hopefully equally sparks the courage of those who are not affected, to ask questions, to try and understand how it might feel, to relate in some way.
It's ok not to know, but it helps to understand.
Why do you want to perform at Edinburgh Festival Fringe? What differentiates it from other festivals?
I can only speak as an audience member so far, but Edinburgh Fringe Festival is incomparable to other festivals. The sheer number of shows and experiences is incredible. The audiences, the atmosphere, it's a buzz that I never experienced anywhere else. At the same time, it allows for brilliant networking opportunities, collaborations and also the necessary time to really run a new show. Getting to run a new show for a month will probably be (positively) exhausting, but will also be the time the show needs to fully grow and be experienced as a performer. It can be hard to individually find the spaces that allow for such a long show run, especially if it’s new and only played a few times.
And incredibly easy access to Irn Bru. It’s like a treasure hunt here in Ireland!
What do you hope to learn or achieve from your first Fringe experience, and how do you plan to apply it to your future work?
I really don’t know what I will learn, but I know there will be many lessons and experiences that will allow me to grow and navigate better, differently through my work and work surroundings. I am going there completely open and willing to learn whatever there is to learn and apply it respectfully. What I am hoping for is the ability to grow into my potential and I am planning on applying it to my work by being receptive to changes and suggestions and not shying away from constructive criticism.
What would you say has been (potentially) the most useful piece of advice you’ve been given about taking a show to Edinburgh Fringe?
Because I’m internally freaking out about how the show will be perceived, how it will all go and this being my first time presenting my own works at Edinburgh Fringe, a close friend and colleague, Chantal McCormick of FidgetFeet, just said ‘Just do your work! Just deliver and remind yourself why you are there: For the Love of Performance!’
How do you plan to balance performing and exploring the vast array of other shows and events happening at the Fringe?
I am actually in a convenient time slot. The show begins 12.15 (let’s just hope that’s not too early for an audience) and finishes 55 minutes later. That means I have the whole afternoon and evening to explore, network and especially watch some shows and feed the inspiration
I think that makes for a good balance between the two things. Plus, selfishly speaking, I love an early-ish slot. Don’t have to wait all day, shuffling my feet until I can go on stage and afterwards can truly relax and take in everything the Edinburgh Fringe has on offer.
How has your background, upbringing and education had an impact on your artistic career?
I had the absolute luck of having very supportive parents, that allowed me to explore as much as possible as I was growing up. That meant (figure of speech) heart attacks for my Ma, and shoulder shrugs and ‘Ah sure, he’ll be fine’ by my Da. So, I tried a lot of things quite early on: different sports, instruments, hobbies of all sorts. And my parents showed me a lot of things early on, that inspired me: from an introduction to H.R Giger and M.C Escher to other surreal and dark artists when I was around 12/13, to music nights with my Da, where he would show me a mad amount of great music of all varieties. In return, they had to deal with a lot of ‘THIS IS NOT JUST A PHASE!’ moments. The state of me! Rocking home with a Mohican style haircut, that resembled a rainbow coloured toothbrush that was chewed on for too long, then suddenly looking like I was freshly excavated at the local graveyard and being ohhhh soooooo filled with melancholy…my parents had to deal with quite a bit there. Now, somebody reading this might think ‘that kid needed direction’ ….and you might be right, just look at my job: Jumping around on stage and hanging underneath the ceiling acting the eejit for money. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Long story short: if it weren’t for my parents’ patience and acceptance of the exploration of my interests, I probably would have never found the kind of work I am doing now. Even though I found it quite late in life (around 23), but because of them I’ve always had the courage to just follow what felt right, rather than follow a monetary focused career. That sounds glorious, but in the meantime, I did work in the worst places and jobs, to be able to explore my interests. Which had a massive impact on my career: I know that I don’t want to go back there!
Can you describe your creative process and how you develop your ideas into a full-fledged performance?
In the past my work wouldn’t so much be about my intention, but more about the aesthetics and actions in combination with the aesthetics, and the intention would surface later. A sort of light-bulb moment when you recognise why you did what you did.
So, for example, I’d see a movement that suddenly sparks an idea, like a mini-story in my head. A character of sorts. And that one movement then dictates the rest of the movements and therefore informs the character development. Then I’d set up simple lights and cameras (torches are a great invention, mobile wee things. Definitely in the Top 10 inventions, somewhere between spatulas and tender stem broccoli), sometimes use projections, and then start exploring with those movement sections and aesthetics.
In short: Most of the time it’s an intuitively led process.
With ‘The Weight of Shadow’ it was a mix of both. Because of the topic and the inspiration behind it all, I had a more linear approach. I wanted the movements and situations to resonate with Cíana, as it’s mostly her experience. So, we worked a lot with feedback sessions, where I’d demonstrate the movements I had in mind and she’d tell me if it resembles what she feels/felt. But at the same time, I was able to use her descriptions and feedback to fully explore unknown territory and let the intuitive side to the process take over at times.
What is your favourite thing about performing for a live audience?
The unpredictability. The adrenaline makes you do stuff on stage sometimes, that suits the moment so perfectly but was never planned in the first place. And unpredictable, happy accidents (R.I.P Bob Ross) that happen, can add to the scene or sometimes even the whole show. Every now and then those accidents are not happy and can make you question yourself and your career choice.
And finally, there’s nothing more fulfilling than hearing applause at the end, especially after a run when the show personally felt bad. Hearing that the work is appreciated, even in its worst moments, is the reason I go up there again and again and again.
What is the strangest thing that has ever happened to you while performing?
Having a venue of round about 2000 raving people, stand in silence with open mouths in front of the stage. No applause…just silence.
I was invited to present a freshly developed act/short-show at a rave in a beautiful old theatre (that Charlie Chaplin AND even Justin Timberlake performed in. Not together, though. Sadly.)
I told the organiser several (!) times that the show would not be suitable for a happy, raving, colourful crowd. The show was about a delusional writer ‘Mr Lanterman’ who through his grief couldn’t distinguish between reality and imagination anymore, all wrapped in a ‘Lynchian’ inspired aesthetic. The ending, not so happy. Anyways, I am explaining this to the organiser, but he’s just shaking it off and says that people love acrobatics, so it doesn’t matter what I do.
So come the day, I hop on stage, do the show and when I finish, I end up standing in front of round about 2000 silent people, mouth open, just staring at me. No claps, not even boos. Just one fella at the very back yelling “F*** YEAH”. I march off stage, feeling emotionally like a forgotten raisin in a sofa crevice, and the organiser looks at me just shaking his head. Which caught me off guard, because I knew that the raving crowd would be on a whole different vibe than what I am presenting, but him shaking his head after I told and warned them about the show not being suitable to that specific event? Pure madness. My show was followed by a DJ trying to pick up the mood of the crowd which, according to him, took him almost an hour. He wouldn’t even take the snickers I offered him as an apology.
What's the most challenging or unconventional venue you've ever performed in, and how did it impact the overall experience?
In this case not a venue as in an enclosed space, but outdoor, site-specific performances. There were a few that were equally mad and challenging. From a construction site in the depths of South London, a very humid forest with heavy fog in Russia, or dragging myself through a glacier in Iceland. The latter being the heaviest on the body and the most inspirational to the mind. The cold biting wind, in a thin costume, all while pretending it’s all sound. But the landscapes surrounding you, will inspire you for months and months if not years. The raw atmosphere and ever-changing nature are incredible. Building a character suitable to the surrounding and then performing in this extreme surrounding, was challenging. But being immersed in all of this and having a natural stage of that magnitude, is incredibly fulfilling.
Who are some of your artistic influences, and how have they shaped your work?
I think my biggest influence, and admiration is for Denis Lavant. I came across his work when I was around 20 and his physicality and ability to fully embody characters and creature-like persona with every single fibre of his body, is mind blowing and pure beauty.
Later on, when I started working in physical performance, he inspired me to look into a more meaningful relationship to my physicality. Instead of doing an acrobatic trick or move for the sake of impressing somebody, use them as a tool of expression.
And Denis Lavant’s rule of freedom: There needs to be a moment that’s not rehearsed, it just needs to happen (for example the fantastic dance scene at the end of ‘Beau Travail’)
Then there are also groups such as Akhe and Derevo from St. Petersburg. Pure madness on stage. Physicality, themes, building and destroying the stage set as they go, and a very authentic nature around their work. It never feels too much, it never feels forced….it just works perfectly.
They inspired me a lot to not be so stiff in my approach to my work, that it’s important to be chaotic in your work, and not always polish it. It makes something far more approachable and less distant to the audience.
Is there a piece of feedback you've received from an audience member or critic after a performance that’s stuck with you?
There’s a few, but the best one yet was ‘This made me so uncomfortable I wanted to leave’. That sounds awful but the context was brilliant:
a) I have yet to find what it was that made the person so uncomfortable, as none of my acts and smaller shows contain anything of shock value, or cheap provocation. But you never know, maybe I was just performing really badly that day?!
b) The person approaching me was a full blown, down-to-the-bone goth. Considering the aesthetic choices in that specific show at the time, I would have thought he’d love it. But he did not, and that’s grand. And finally,
c) WANTED to leave! What kept him there? Was it the feeling of witnessing an accident? Like you are not supposed to look but you can’t look away either?
I just loved how he stormed up to me. That sense of urgency in his step that signalled ‘If I am not going to tell him now, I am going to blow up’. I didn’t want to take chances here, so I let the man speak.
Is there a show you’re excited to see when you’re up there?
Oh there’s a few. I am looking forward to seeing Paper Swans by Vyte Garrigas, which is a visually beautiful, absurd theatre piece that draws its inspiration directly from Vyte’s experience as a woman from a post-Soviet country, and the connected trauma and experiences during that time.
Then there’s ‘A Brief Case of Crazy’ by Sekdaddle Theatre. Brilliant physical comedy about one person’s quest for romance that encounters a boisterous boss, and a rather troublesome briefcase.
And then the very relevant ‘Rebels & Patriots’ by Floating Shed. It’s a Palestinian-Israeli co-creation about the toxicity and consequences of conscription to the IDF and a call to end the bloodshed in Gaza.
A very poignant show that I highly suggest.
When and where can people see your show?
It’s on from 1st-25th August (except 7th,22nd,23rd August), at 12.15 pm at the Assembly Checkpoint (3 Bristo Place, EH1 1EY), with a running time of 55 minutes
And where can people find you online?
Ideally my Instagram: www.instagram.com/sashakrohn
Or also my website www.sashakrohn.com
The Weight of Shadow will be performed at 12:15 at Assembly Checkpoint from 1st – 25th August (Not 7th, 22nd or 23rd)
Booking Link: https://assemblyfestival.com/whats-on/628-the-weight-of-shadow
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