Today I went to my mom's work because she asks me too, (to improve the relation mother-daughter) and my mom works at a construction company so the environment can get really tough, very sexist and degrading, and unfortunately there is no culture for the society in this place to even defend ourselves, or at least that’s how I feel right now, the thing that happened today was that I decided to use a crop-top kinda tank-top that wasn’t that revealing and honestly, yes, it showed a little cleavage, but to be fair I use that style of clothing just because I like it on me, not for someone else and not to even think for a guy, not even with boys that I like or have a crush on, so anyway, my mom has this coworker, they are in like a “team” even tho my mom is his boss, but at lunch time we sat in a table and (at this point of course I’m not stupid, knowing I was in an environment that aggressive I decided to wear a huge hoodie in color black closed all freaking day) but at this moment I was very uncomfortable because the hoodie was very warm ant it’s mid summer, so at the lunch table being just my mom, the coworker and me alone in a freaking restaurant,( so like far away from the construction area) I went for food to eat, and when I came back I see my mom with a straight face and not having it, i didn’t ask I thought it was just work, but turns out after coming back home she says how her coworker said to her when I wasn’t around and quote: “you know, your daughter thinks she’s a women but she’s just a child, and she cannot wear that type of clothes around guys with those intentions” so my mom freaked out and of course got mad but couldn’t actually said something in my or her defence because of the work so she got mad at me and made me feel humiliated and guilty just for wear a freaking tanktop shirt, the worst part is that he expressed that in a way like I was trying to do something, but I don’t even talk to him, look at him, touch him, God no, like I was sitting there eating my pizza minding my own business, and then I just had a huge fight with my mom and we cry and honestly about an our ago my mother told me how I cannot tell him something because of her work but I’m honestly considering to blow a tire of his car or maybe two, but at the same time I don’t think is worth it I just want to defend myself and make him feel bad for his offensive comment, he just couldn’t accept that he looked at a seventeen year old in a way he shouldn’t because of his soberb mind, so yeah, right now I reflected and he’s not worth of my revenge and my time I just think this is a problem as women because my mom feels that she cannot protect me and I’m in danger or something like that, and I understand her, she has been a victim of abuse from men in different horrible ways, but I don’t wanna feel like this, and I don’t wanna stop using clothes I like just because some jerk thinks he’s the master of everything and knows me and my “intentions” but he’s just a man that cannot mature and be freaking healthy, in his soul and mind, so I believe in karma and I trust that all his negativity and bad vibes will return to him, I just think that no one, no matter boy or girl, should feel like this, threatened and unable to respond back and defend her/himself. So yeah that was my story, thanks to read it. Love D.
(Btw comments opinion I would love to read because honestly I’m pretty mad rn)
I'm sorry this happened and obviously upset you. I think you are right not to take any action against him no matter how upset you felt.
This is a difficult issue. Everyone should be able to express their personality through their clothes and appearance and feel safe doing so but unfortunately this is not always the case. Perhaps this is something you might want to do some research into and come back and tell us what you find out.